Robbie:
I have heard among this clan
You are called the forgotten man
Jon:
Is that what they’re saying?
Well did you evah!
What a swell party this is
Robbie:
And have you heard the story of a boy, a girl
Unrequited love?
Jon:
Sounds like your soap opera
Robbie:
I may cry
Jon:
Tune in tomorrow
What a swell party this is

What frails
What frocks
Robbie:
What broads
Jon:
What pearls
What rocks
Robbie:
They’re bootiful
Jon:
I’ve never seen such gaiety
Robbie:
Neither have I
Jon:
It’s all just too, too risqué really

Robbie:
This French champagne
Jon:
Domestic
Robbie & Jon:
So good for the brain
Robbie:
That’s what I was gonna say
Jon:
You know you’re a brilliant fellow?
Robbie:
Why thank you
Jon:
Pick it up, Jack
Oh please don’t eat that glass, my friend

Have you heard about dear Blanche?
Got run down by an avalanche
Robbie:
No!
Jon:
Oh, don’t worry, she’s a game girl you know
Got up and finished 4th
Robbie:
The kid’s got guts
Jon:
Havin’ a nice time?
Grab a line

Robbie:
Have you heard that Mimsy Star
Jon:
Oh, what now?
Robbie:
She got pinched in the Astor Bar
Jon:
Slushed again, ey?
Robbie:
She was stoned
Jon:
Well did you evah
Robbie:
Nevah
Robbie & Jon:
What a swell party this is

Jon:
Hey check out that ass!
Robbie:
Aah, that’s a lovely dress
Do you think I could talk her out of it?

It’s great
Jon:
Ah, it’s great
Robbie:
So grand
Jon:
So grand
Robbie & Jon:
This wonderland
Robbie:
La la...
Jon:
Ladada...
We sing
Robbie:
Oh we sing
Jon:
So rare
Robbie:
So rare
Jon:
Like old camembert
Robbie:
Old camembert
Robbie & Jon:
Like ba, ba rum
Jon:
Ba, ba, ba bum
Robbie:
Don’t dig that kind of crooning, chum

Robbie & Jon:
Have you heard, it’s in the stars
Next July we collide with Mars
Well did you evah
What a swell party
A swell party
A swellegant, elegant party this is

Jon:
I drink to your health
Robbie:
Naah, let’s drink to your wealth
Jon:
You’re my bon ami
Robbie:
Hey, that’s French
Jon:
Liberty
Robbie & Jon:
Fraternity

Have you heard, it’s in the stars
Next July we collide with Mars
Well did you evah
What a swell party
A swell party
A swellegant, elegant party this is